On March 8th 1975, my body emerged from my mama’s in a San Francisco hospital. While birthdays have always been special, they’re getting better as I age because — for cryin’ out sweet ‘n loud — it’s International Women’s Day!
Somehow it feels like Life placed a torch in my newborn paws, whose songs burns in honor of Her:
In 2015, I led a group of women through a 3-part workshop called When Woman Owns Her Power. Why? Because women are awe-inspiring. This year, I wrote a piece that aims to capture what it’s like when women own our power.
What is our power anyway?
Here’s the piece below — and here is the full piece on my blog (including a letter, Dear Woman). Let me know how it lands with you!
She… lives her truth. She lives the way she is guided to think, feel and act, in all these ways and more. The more consciously she chooses to live her truth, the more she will feel the power that is her essence: Love.
She… listens to the voice within, creating a life of authenticity by trusting her own inner wisdom.
She… revels in the gift of being born in a woman’s body.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… is mindful about her intakes with food, water and medicine.
She… honors her body’s unique needs for movement, expressing her gratitude for the gift of life by supporting her body’s desire to be healthy and strong.
She… observes her poor choices and becomes present so that she can steer towards mindful choices that serve her soul, asking for help when she needs it.
She… respects her natural beauty, regardless of what she looks like, graciously declining an oppressive societal narrative that tells her to wear this to make her body or face do that.
She… adorns her body with as little or as much — clothing, makeup, piercings, tattoos, jewelry — as is authentic for her.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… makes Love to herself, accepting Eros as a human right. Releasing anybody else from the duty of being her lover, she marvels in self-pleasure, never leaving herself starving for the gift of human touch.
She… makes Love to whoever she chooses as her lover, courageously accepting that all of intimacy’s challenges are worth the abundant beauty she feels in the heated and tender embrace of romance.
She… lives “all out”, taking up space if and how she wants to. She chooses radical self acceptance, loving herself regardless of her intended or unintended impacts.
She… plays her bigger game, recovering gracefully when she makes messes, taking responsibility for her unintended impact on others.
She… doesn’t try to play God. She accepts that she is here to focus mostly on her own thoughts, feelings and actions, and doesn’t try to fix other people. She accepts that despite appearances, they aren’t broken and their path is their own to live.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… openly gives and receives feedback. She knows that she needs input from others that is sometimes uncomfortable, in order to live her fullest life.
She… sets clear boundaries. She has access to her Yes and her No. She stays tuned to her needs and preferences, so she can navigate consciously with boundaries. With herself and others, she clearly communicates her boundaries with her body and with words. When she needs help establishing boundaries, she asks for and gratefully receives it.
Let us emphasize this:
She is as willing to receive as she is to give.
To be cared for, as she is to extend care.
She… receives stellar support. She knows she cannot shine as brightly as she is meant to, unless she is supported by others who feel great Love for her and what she’s up to. Nothing is too big or small for her to ask for help with.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… shines. She feels the Love of God, Goddess, Spirit, Source deep inside of her, and from this place she gives herself permission to shine that Light along her human journey.
She… accepts that any and all judgment she feels of others, stems from her own inner struggle. When she feels or extends judgment, she recovers to ask within: How is this actually about me? And how can I love myself through this?
She… breathes the liberated breath of forgiveness — accepting that humans can only do one of two things: express Love or call for Love. When someone is unkind in any way, she reminds herself that they are calling for Love, and it is not her job to fix them — they are not broken, perhaps simply confused — their essence, too, is Love.
She… expresses herself through creative avenues that light her inner fire, her artist self, her muses.
She… creates a healthy relationship with money — how she attracts it and how she spends it — acknowledging society’s financial bias towards men yet not giving it power over her financial independence.
She… accepts that a society based in “an economy" is not designed at its core to honor Life, and she chooses to Be the Change she wishes to see in the world, creating community, relations — Village — that sees Life as more important than money.
She… invests her attention in friendships that feel resonant and lets go of friendships that do not.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… knows it is her choice to have a baby, or not. She loves herself regardless of whether she chooses to have children of her own. She loves herself through pregnancy and/or adoption, abortion and — a pain as great as any — the death of her own child.
She… tends to the little girl inside of her. Where her inner child is wounded, she steps up to support her healing. She plays, laughs and frolics freely to keep her inner child alive instead of pretending an adult is only that.
She… celebrates and honors men, including her father, son, partner, friends, male role models or any other men in her life. She notices wounds she has experienced in relationships with men and takes action to heal them so she does not recreate the same traumas for herself or transfer them to her children.
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When Woman owns her power,
She… remembers she is made of Love. It is her essence, even while she experiences the limitations of the human experience in a physical body.
She… respects the body of Mother Earth, our planetary home and life support system, its body — flora, fauna, fluid and breath — as worthy of Love as her own.
She… rests her precious body and mind in the loving presence of the divine. She feels comforted and held here, whether sleeping or awake.
Woman, Man or something else…
There is no question: You are COMPLETELY loved.
Now and always.
So today, consider a woman who you ADORE, and take one minute to extend your radical thanks to her. Tell her something about her that’s amazing. Tell her what she gives you, how your Life is better with her in it.
What if she dies today? Her body, that is. She will never die. What if you die today?
Inspiring, as always!