REVEL: A Near Death Directive

A Disc & 10 Dresses

May 01, 2024

This post is unusually lush, with a story of great significance — on the core message spoken by my near death experience (NDE). Lots of photos too, not my norm.

I won’t send another post for two weeks since today I’ll scoot off on a retreat to focus on the book I’m writing: Making Love to Fear. I’m headed to the spacious serenity of Sea Ranch.

To all of you who donated to make this retreat happen, my heart, my pen and I extend EFFUSIVE THANKS!

REVEL: A Near Death Directive

Last winter, I learned of the strong correlation between breast cancer in women, and our tendency to take care of others and put self-care in the backseat. Hearing this brought me back to the primary message I received in my February 2021 NDE —

Revel.

In a word, I heard… Revel.

As I felt into its meaning, I heard —

“Woman, you give so much. You work so hard. Don’t forget to play. Respect yourself. You’ve been given Life. You are breathing! Bask. Delight in this crazy thing called human being.”

It felt like a directive from the divine stars that filled my core during the NDE.

“Woman, you are so generous. Today's all you've got. Are you going to love it for your own precious self, just like you do for others? How fully will you live your joy?”

With my head still sliced open in the weeks after brain surgery, shut only by 52 titanium staples, heavy painkillers coursing through my veins, my answer was —

YES.

All the way.

And so, in October 2023 — 2 1/2 years after brain surgery — on the Sonoma coast just north of San Francisco, I invited two friends on an adventure that would photographically capture the joy I was living.

First, let me paint the sweet history of this joy’s unfolding.

For 28 years, I’ve been in Love with frisbee. Freestyle, to be precise. Ultimate Frisbee is too fast and technical for me; I don’t like speed and I’m not competitive. Frisbee Golf is more goal-oriented than free-flow; I don’t like golf, even if a disc is involved.

In 1996, my college boyfriend Kevin taught me to throw. He's masterful at it and I never thought I’d be anything beyond a beginner.

Life had other plans. I’m far from masterful, yet I do get called “Laser” with some of my hucks.

I am a freestyle disc devotee.

It’s so simple. All I have to do is carry this little recycled plastic disc with me, find an open space and a friend to throw with, and I'm all set. I don't need to tow any trailers or repair complicated machines or spend any money, it’s an excellent workout when I want it to be, my minimalist values are honored, and I get —

Ecstasy.

Moving the body in free, full rhythm, it's a theatrical dance with a dinner plate-shaped toy soaring in spirals and arcs, an enchanting display of physics between me and a mate.

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Flashback to 2010 when I lived in San Diego, and could skip from my cottage steps down to Swami’s Beach in just five minutes. Swami’s was named after Paramahansa Yogananda, founder of the Self Realization Fellowship. Built in 1937, SRF’s Golden Lotus Temple stood on the cliffs above the beach.

One epic day at sunset while throwing with a dear friend, I looked up and discovered he was taking photos of me. I blushed a bit, then suddenly realized this was the first time in my Life — having been in Love with this sport for 14 years — that I had my picture taken playing it.

People who love riding horses often have their picture taken.

In school, when you play volleyball or soccer, you have your photos taken.

I had never done this.

I thought, When did celebrating our joy become unusual? I wanted to be part of reclaiming this human birthright.

Those photos from 2010 remain special to me. So after my NDE, when my entire Life started glowing with the stars of divine Light that blessed me on that brain surgery operating table, I committed to reveling as much as I possibly could. Frisbee’s played a joyful role. In the last three years, I've thrown more than in all 25 years before.

And then I decided to put a cherry on top. With 14 years since those San Diego photos were taken, I wondered —

What if I even more fully reveled, as if I had been given a commandment from that doorway between what we call Life and death?

Last autumn with two dear friends, it happened!

An artful adventure came to Life, which I'm delighted to share with you today. Two of the greatest loves of my Life communed in the sand — dresses and frisbee —

A Disc & 10 Dresses
Ten sets of photos depicting the revelry of freestyle frisbee

Ten dresses in tow, off to the beach we went. My disc pal Steven brought his camera and my delightful friend Anya (@anya.alara) threw with me. (Her father Paul Clark was a national champion. How cool is that!?)

How about you — what brings bliss to your miraculous physical form? Playing the piano? Hiking? Sculpting? Seducing snowflakes? When was the last time you had your picture taken, living your joy?

with great Love,

Jessica Rios

Founder, Leaning into Light

me & Anya (R) and her dad, Paul Clark (top middle w/fly 'stache)

This post has far more photos than any other, since I first started Leaning into Light in 2015. So I’m sharing the rest of them here for those wanting more. The other half (five out of 10 series) are below.

Thanks to my pal Steven for making me laugh in the sand, and for his camera-savvy companionship. @spkphotos Olympus OM-D E-M5 Mark ii